The Gingerbread Princess
by Icemera
Summary: AC. Absolute Crack. Shizuru as the Gingerbread Princess! No kids allowed!
1. Chapter 1

**The Gingerbread Princess**

**A/N:** I left this story hanging from other fandom, and lost interest in their characters. So here I just decided to turn it into a ShizNat instead. Not edited. Beta is busy. And it is too silly to be taken seriously :P Umm, btw, I'm doing this just to kill time, so there might be some updates… sometimes… later… umm…

**Warning: umm, yeah… no kids allowed. **

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**Chapter One**

Once upon a time, there was a peaceful kingdom of Alya, so very far across the sea, where grasses were as soft as cotton, and the blue skies rained gold. Over the next seven days, the king and queen granted free food and drink for every citizen in the celebration of Princess Tomoe's engagement to Prince Takumi of Windbloom.

And that meant…

"Free food? Since when we are _free_…!"

"If we're eaten by beggars, we'll be going to hell!"

"That's right! We must flee!"

"Where to? Down the bourgeoisie' throats?"

While all the members of gingerbread community were having a fiery discussion in the Royal kitchen, a gingerbread girl was sat on a knife's blade, playing with her sugarcoated, chestnut hair. Everyone called her Shizuru. Her parents were eaten by the queen's nephew, and that was why she was dubbed 'gingerbread princess'. But it didn't mean much when she was a princess with no crown. She was just a gingerbread orphan with a little fancier background than everyone else in this room.

An old gingerbread man with a candy cane walked up to her. Everyone called him Sakomizu.

"Why are you sitting on the blade? It's dangerous!" old Sakomizu said.

"It keeps my ass cool, sir," the gingerbread girl replied nonchalantly.

"Stand up, girl! You might lose your bottom if you don't sit right!"

Grumbling, Shizuru stood up, staring at him with her red, M&M eyes.

"You've got nice eyes, little girl," old Sakomizu said.

"Everyone only said that because I've got a brand name on my face," Shizuru muttered in despair.

The old man raised his brows.

"And why are you so dark, sir? Everybody here is white," Shizuru asked, frowning. "Your hairdo is afro even."

"They dropped some chocolate powder on me right before I was baked," old Sakomizu whispered in a hushed tone.

"Oh… so…" The gingerbread girl then smiled from ear to ear. "Yow, what's up! Don't ya worry nuthin' 'bout that. You look mega fine, dude!"

The old man stopped. "Girl, I ain't got nuthin' against you, but… you know you're a lil' weird…"

The gingerbread girl just stared at him. She couldn't blink too much because the M&M buttons were rather solid. They might break.

Suddenly, all the windows were blown opened. Everyone took hurried steps away, gasping as three gingerbread witches flew in on their bread sticks.

"Alas, everyone, you would rather die at the tip of my wand than going down the colons of commoners!" the head witch declared.

Although the gingerbread girl didn't know why everyone was murmuring and holding on to one another in fright, she quickly crawled among the crowd, heading towards the door. Old Sakomizu followed suit.

"Where are you going, little girl? They're going to kill us all," old Sakomizu said, his face nearly hit her bread bottom.

"If you come any closer, I might fart in your face," Shizuru spat.

"Thank you for the warning, Princess," another voice interrupted.

The gingerbread girl tried her best to look over her stiff, baked shoulder. An old gingerbread woman in glasses was crawling right towards her. Everyone called her Maria.

"I'm no princess, and you, too, stay away from my ass," Shizuru ordered, and then slipped her slim body under the door.

Soon, the three gingerbreads were out in the hallway. And they could hear the screams from inside the kitchen as bright lights flashed repeatedly from the witches' sticks.

"Who are those witches?" Shizuru asked.

"They're the old, bitter widows from the ancient tomb! Their husbands left them for younger gingerbread girls, the very reason they committed suicide. Now, their spirits have come back to haunt us all the gingerbread people," old Sakomizu said.

"They killed themselves? How?"

"They sneaked into a carpenter's home, and put themselves on his plate! Being eaten by poor people will send your soul to hell!"

"Ah, stop that nonsense, Sakomizu!" Maria said, and then turned to Shizuru. "It doesn't matter if you are eaten by a poor, or a rich man, you'll go to hell anyway."

The stomping and crashing inside the kitchen grew louder, and the three gingerbreads looked up and saw a cook storming into the hallway.

"Oh, my God!" Shizuru's eyes widened.

"Where is He!" old Sakomizu frantically looked around.

Shizuru sprinted away from the human's path, the two old gingerbreads closely behind. After the cook went into the kitchen, all sounds stopped. If the witches hadn't killed all the gingerbreads inside, the remaining would have to pretend they were dead anyway. It was a crime to move in front of humans because the humans would never eat them again. What was the point in being a gingerbread man then?

Running in the dark, Shizuru couldn't tell where she was going. She tripped and was run over by someone.

"Oops! Who is that!" old Sakomizu shrieked.

"It's me. Shhhh!"

"Oh, I'm so sorry, little girl. I didn't mean to step on you."

"It's all right. I hate my foot anyway. I'm getting old, so they don't give me new shoes anymore," Shizuru said.

Eventually, they slipped under a door and crawled inside. And they had to stop for a moment, in awe of the very large and elegant room they were in.

"They're coming!" Maria pushed old Sakomizu and Shizuru a little further away from the door. The witches had escaped the eye of the cook, and followed them here.

"What are we going to do now?" old Sakomizu asked, sweating as he hid behind a chair's leg. It was large enough to hide two gingerbreads only.

The gingerbread girl thought it was hard for the old ones to climb, so she climbed up the table herself. She had practiced it with real trees whenever she got bored with the kitchen and went for a walk in the park. She would only do it at night, of course. A human might die of a heart attack just to see a small gingerbread like her strolling.

Just when Shizuru was going to hide in a music box, the witches slipped under the door and flew right at her, pointing their wands at her.

"Do not be afraid!" the first witch said.

"I will put you out of misery!" the second witch said.

"It is time to enjoy being a gingerbread man for eternity!" the third witch said.

"No… She's mine."

"Na-uh! She's mine!"

"Not so fast, girls. She's mine!"

And the witches pointed their wands at the gingerbread princess all at once. KAZOOOOOM! A mushroom cloud erupted all over the room as if a nuclear bomb had been dropped. The gingerbread girl's body was blown away into the thick fog. And when the witches left, old Sakomizu and Maria sadly looked at each other. Their little princess was gone…

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When the morning came, and the gingerbread girl opened her eyes to the sight of a young woman standing next to her, staring in bewilderment. That must be Princess Tomoe.

_I can't believe I'm so lucky; I'll be eaten by royalty! Papa, Mama! Aren't you proud of me? _Thinking all the good thoughts, Shizuru closed her eyes, and tried not to grin. A few moments had passed, but Princess Tomoe still did not pick her up.

Shizuru opened her eyes again, and realized that the giant princess didn't look so gigantic to her now. They were about the same size. Springing up from the floor, she frantically looked up and down and around. She caught her reflection in the mirror and went… _THE WITCHES! WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO ME?_

"Are you all right?" Princess Tomoe asked, observing the chestnut-haired stranger in great curiosity.

Out of the blue, a lady-in-waiting came through the door with a wide smile on her face. Everyone called her Aoi. Gasping, the lady dropped the tea tray to the floor. "Oh, God! Oh, no! Not again!" She then composed herself and stared hard at the gingerbread girl. "How could you possibly get in here? What have you done to my princess?"

The gingerbread girl quickly hid behind the princess' white nightgown. But she realized that… _I'm as naked as a gingerbread girl should be… _She eventually looked up at the princess and dryly smiled.

Staring at Shizuru, the princess said, "Leave us."

No one moved.

The princess turned to Aoi. "I meant you."

"But Princess! Prince Takumi will be here in seven days! The king expects you to marry him and conceive many strong sons!"

"She is then my guest for seven days. Leave us." Princes Tomoe smiled, waving the lady-in-waiting away.

When Aoi left, Princess Tomoe turned at the gingerbread girl. "Now, tell me who you are. What's your name? And how did you come to sleep on my floor?"

The gingerbread girl thought very hard. "Everyone called me Shizuru," she said. "I—I—uh—I'm a gingerbread princess—from—uh—the Gingerbread land…"

"Gingerbread land?" Princess Tomoe looked puzzled, thinking she hadn't paid enough attention to the geography class. "Do they not wear clothes in Gingerbread land?"

"Oh, no, we don't wear much! We don't take showers! We don't do so much as talking and sleeping, and we go to wars only in shoes!"

"Must be a string of interesting battles. Is that to get your enemies distracted?" Princess Tomoe let out a deep guttural laugh.

"Umm, it's just how we are…" Shizuru said.

"I would have you as you are, then."

The gingerbread girl didn't understand what the princess meant until she had to spend a whole day, walking around the princess' bedroom naked. When the night fell, Shizuru couldn't take it anymore.

"I'm cold, Princess."

In her new gown, Princess Tomoe was lying the bed, smiling. "You can wear my clothes now. Since you are an honorary guest to our kingdom, my father and my mother must be expecting you at supper!"

Having a dinner with the king and queen was frightening enough, but… _EATING WHAT!_

At the dinning table, the king and queen reluctantly looked at each other. Being an avid hunter and an athlete, the king couldn't remember the last time he was in his study room. Turning to the guest, he smiled broadly.

"Ah, I'm sure all has gone well in Gingerbread land since my last visit…" the king said, clearing his throat. "Kansaki, more wine!"

And the queen knew it was her turn now. "Lovely princess, how was your journey? Oh, how I despise those dull and long trips!"

"Umm, it was quite a..." Shizuru briefly glanced at Princess Tomoe, who had been fixing her gaze upon her the whole day. "It was quite an exciting journey… A group of bandits robbed my carriage and I had to flee into your castle. I apologize for the abrupt appearance…"

"Apologize to no one, dear! We, royalties, do not apologize!" the king said, laughing.

"Would you like some more turkey?" Princess Tomoe asked, already holding the fork with a piece of turkey up to Shizuru's mouth.

"I—I don't eat… this…" Shizuru moved away a little. But she was feeling a little strange in her stomach. What was this crying noise? It never happened before.

"Well, I seem to remember that Gingerbread people are vegetarians," the king interrupted.

Shizuru just nodded, and Princess Tomoe crossly bit the turkey piece off the fork, chewing and staring at her.

"Why are you staring at me?" Shizuru whispered.

"I find you rather hard to please," Princess Tomoe replied.

"You have a bean on your cheek," Shizuru said, lightly brushing it away.

The king and queen gasped! No one was supposed to touch the princess but the princess' groom. Although it wasn't new to Princess Tomoe, she pretended to gasp, too.

"Boys! Water!" the queen demanded in fright. And three, young and handsome men each promptly handed the queen a cup of water. Lightly smiling at the men, she took a while to choose a cup.

"Pick one, mother!" Princess Tomoe said.

"Looks like it's time for dessert!" the king announced, clapping.

"Dessert?" Shizuru asked, her face going pale.

"Yes, we have the finest gingerbreads in all the worlds!" the king said. "Oh, but not as fine as yours! I've tried yours once, and stole the recipe." He chuckled madly when a large tray of gingerbreads was served.

"I came up with the recipe, love," the queen objected. But the king just stomped on her foot, shutting her up.

Princess Tomoe gave it one last try. She stabbed her fork into one of the gingerbread, not knowing how Shizuru flinched, and then put the fork up to Shizuru's mouth again.

From the persistent stare, Shizuru knew that if she wouldn't take this one, she might be the next to be stabbed with that fork. Slowly, she closed her eyes, and the princess shoved the gingerbread into her mouth.

"How do you like it?" Princess Tomoe asked.

_What's that kicking in my mouth?_ Shizuru still didn't dare to open her eyes. And she could hear someone screaming. _Just wait, my brother. Just wait. I'll spit you out as soon as I get out of this horrid place._

"How do you like it?" Princess Tomoe repeated in a harsher tone this time, grabbing Shizuru's neck and, accidentally, forcing the bite down Shizuru's throat.

Shizuru opened her eyes, gasping for breath. _I'm doomed! I ate my own kind!_ She coughed furiously, and Princess Tomoe quickly handed her a cup of water.

"How do you like it?" The princess still wouldn't give up.

Shizuru gulped down the water as quickly as possible. Not enough! She stood up and snatched the king's wine and gulped that down as well. More! She took the queen's cup and finished it, too. She just hoped that her countryman didn't suffer much.

When her head stopped spinning, Shizuru looked around and found herself standing in the stunned eye of the royal family. And she knew she had to find those three witches soon…

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Much to Princess Tomoe's protest, the king and queen had arranged a guest room for Shizuru, in which the gingerbread girl gleefully accepted.

Pacing around in her room, Shizuru looked up and down. "Maria! Sakomizu! Where are you!"

A small voice came from somewhere below. "Shizuru!"

Shizuru yelped, jumping in fright.

"DON'T! Just don't crush us now!" The chocolate gingerbread man scooted to hide behind Maria.

"Thank God you're here!" Shizuru threw herself down beside them.

Maria studied the chestnut-haired giant. "Wow, you're not as ugly as I thought."

"Please find the witches! They made me into this horrid creature!" Shizuru pleaded.

"You ate Tate!" Sakomizu pointed his fingerless hand up at Shizuru's nose.

"That was Frankie," Maria countered, pushing him.

"I don't care! Find the witches!" Shizuru yelled.

_Knock! Knock! Knock!_

The three gingerbreads turned to stare at the door.

"It must be that psychotic princess," Shizuru whispered edgily.

"Listen carefully, little girl. We'll try to find the witches as soon as possible. All the while, you must learn how to be a human just in case… just in case you should stay human forever," Maria said.

"Why should I stay this way?" Shizuru asked, panicking.

"The cook had just baked a whole, new army of gingerbreads. And guess what! They all have learned of your crime against gingerbread law! They're coming after you!" Sakomizu informed.

Shizuru gasped, hands covering her mouth.

_KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!_

"Go get it!" Maria said. She and Sakomizu then went to hide under the bed.

The gingerbread girl took in a long breath and opened the door.

"Oh… Hello…" Princess Tomoe whispered huskily. In her see-through nightgown, she was leaning against the doorframe, one hand resting on her hip, gazing Shizuru up and down as if she was naked. "May I come in?"

Shuddering slightly at the sight, Shizuru sidestepped for the princess. The princess came through and then kicked the door shut. She grabbed the gingerbread girl, throwing her against the wall.

"Don't kill me!" Shizuru shut her eyes.

"Maaaaaaaw! Come on, baby, I know you're hungry!" Princess Tomoe growled, throwing herself against Shizuru. She pushed her tongue into Shizuru's mouth, tastelessly groping her huge breasts.

Under the bed, Maria and Sakomizu watched with their mouths wide open.

"The princess is homosexual!" Maria gasped.

"But is Shizuru equipped down there! As far as I know, gingerbread girls have but very, little, tiny holes!"

Maria began touching herself. "Mine would work just fine!"

Sakomizu spat.

"The cook made it especially for me!" Maria said proudly.

Sakomizu stuck his tongue out in disgust. When Shizuru began to moan, the two elderly gingerbreads stopped. Quietly, they watched the humans, feeling their sugarcoated bodies might melt now.

Princess Tomoe shoved her hand down Shizuru's skirt, causing the girl to jerk at the touch. Shizuru couldn't help it. The panic aside, her hip started to rock with the rough movements of the princess' hand.

"What—what—are you doing!" Shizuru finally pushed the princess away.

"Mmmmmmmm, I know you want it!" Princess Tomoe didn't waste any more time. Obviously, she needed it more than the honorary guest did.

Shizuru was thrown onto the bed, and the princess instantly straddled her, ripping her dress off. Moaning, Shizuru closed her eyes as the princess licked the base of her neck. But she jumped when the princess began to move down and sucked her nipple.

"Not the raisin!" Shizuru yelped.

"What…?" Princess Tomoe looked clueless, still licking it.

"Ner… ner… Nothing… Ah…" The gingerbread girl harshly gripped the bed sheet, and thanked God that she had fingers now, or she'd be in real trouble.

"Hmmm… Are all gingerbread people this sweet?" Princess Tomoe looked up, arching one brow and tilting her chin up in the smoldering post.

"Why are you stopping!" Shizuru asked, exasperated.

"Why is she stopping!" Sakomizu asked Maria, stomping his cane.

"Because we don't fuck like men do. We talk, too," Panting, Maria said, shakily adjusting her glasses.

Princess Tomoe crawled up, lying on top of Shizuru. Sliding her hairy thigh between Shizuru's legs, she began to move up and down, slowly at first, and then picked up the speed. The gingerbread girl moaned louder and louder, and the bed shook against the wall harder and harder.

"What are you doing, Sakomizu?" Maria asked, watching the old gingerbread man climbing up the bed. She then followed suit. When the elders reached the top of the bed, they struggled to stand on the bouncing plane.

"Why isn't she naked!" Sakomizu asked, pointing his cane at Princess Tomoe's big ass.

Maria glanced around. The room was kept dark, and since only gingerbread people could hear gingerbread talking, she decided to sneak closer, hiding behind Shizuru's pillow.

"Shizuru… Shizuru…" Maria whispered as not to startle the gingerbread girl; Lord knew how fragile she was now.

Wiping the sweat off her face, Shizuru opened her eyes, frowning. "Not now," Shizuru whispered back as the princess moved down.

"Take her clothes off," Maria continued.

"No!" Shizuru blushed.

The princess halted, and then smiled. "Are you playing hard to get?" she asked. "May I say that it's a bit too late now?" She stroked the soft spot between Shizuru's legs, causing the gingerbread girl to shiver.

"I… I… We don't do this… We don't have sex… We, Gingerbread people…" Shizuru managed to deliver the line of law of Gingerbread land, hoping that if they caught her in the action, her penalty might be lessened.

In truth, Gingerbread people were as hypocritical as anyone else. They fucked like rabbits. They had too much free time, and there wasn't much to do anyway. Shizuru had never felt like this since her gingerbread lover (everyone called her something but Shizuru couldn't recall at the mo due to her amnesia) was packed up and sent to Mr. Kuga's mansion. Being eaten by Mr. Kuga's children-in-care must have sent her ex to heaven.

"Oh, princess!" Shizuru cried out as she came in Princess' Tomoe's mouth. She must have bruised the princess' lips, but she couldn't care less now. They were right; being eaten by rich people would send her to heaven.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

The birds chirped just outside the window, and the noise stirred Shizuru out of slumber. Eyes closed dreamily, she stretched, whimpering. Her body ached all over, especially the lower part. She doubted how she could walk properly today. But she frowned when she felt a furry sponge rubbing against her face. She opened her eyes…

_What is this…?_

The blue sky out the window wasn't the first thing she saw; she found her face right between Princess Tomoe's legs. The princess was bracing herself against the wall, both hands on the head of the bed.

Princess Tomoe smirked down at Shizuru. The lips between her legs moved in synch as she said, "Good morning, Shizuru!"

"Holy shit, it talks!" Shizuru exclaimed in excitement.

The birds crazily gathered at the window, chirping so loud the princess was sure she had received a standing ovation for her performance.

Behind the vase on the table, Sakomizu and Maria watched the trick, jaws dropped.

"I knew she's something!" old Sakomizu muttered hoarsely, hands shaking. "Say 'Good morning, Uncle Sakomizu'. Say it nicely, girl. Grrrr."

Maria licked her lips, sweating. The morning was too hot to handle. As much as the two old gingerbreads wanted to stay longer, they knew they had more important task at hand: finding the witches.

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"For Frankie!" a tanned gingerbread girl yelled. Everyone called her Natsuki.

"FOR FRANKIE!" The whole army of newly baked gingerbreads shouted in unison after the feisty, new leader they found in this difficult time. They had to escape from being shipped off to poor citizens' homes, and also were indebted to avenge the death of Frankie.

"But what are we going to do with Shizuru now? She's turned into a giant!"

"She could crush us with just one breast!"

"You meant one foot!"

"And she is partying endlessly with the royalties! She has the most powerful allies! They might refuse to eat us if we harmed Shizuru!"

Sakomizu and Maria stood at the farthest row, watching in fright. Things had heated up so badly, and they still couldn't find the three witches.

"Maybe it's for the better," Maria whispered to Sakomizu. She already despised Natsuki for being so young and had already taken control of the community. She found Natsuki's independence so arrogant and crude. And she couldn't stand the red band Natsuki wore across her forehead.

"Calm down, everyone!" Natsuki said, holding both hands up high. Her sparkling green M&M eyes stared intently down at her countrymen. "Some of you will be sent to rich homes, but you can't abandon us by jumping down their throats! You must come back for us! Some of you will be sent to poor homes, but I authorize your escape from those retched places! Together, we will bring the criminal to justice! Together, we will bring peace to the gingerbread community again!"

The crowd cheered, jumping around in the royal kitchen.

"I say we better take that ape down now. She's causing too much trouble," Maria said to Sakomizu.

"But… but Shizuru was wrong…" old Sakomizu said reluctantly.

"Coward! We were so friendly, sleeping on her bed last night, weren't we? We're in this together now. We can't abandon her!"

Old Sakomizu nodded. "What's your plan?"

"I'll lure the power-hungry bitch to Shizuru's room, and then—"

"Are you sure that's wise? Shizuru goes cannibalistic now. If she sees Natsuki, she might—"

"Hush! We'll let Princess Tomoe eat Natsuki!"

Sakomizu gasped at the thought of how the princess ate Shizuru last night.

"We're doing Natsuki a huge favor. After she was sent to heaven, we could take Shizuru here and explain everything," Maria said.

Old Sakomizu nodded in agreement.

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"You can't find the witches then… Okay… Hmm…" Shizuru said absentmindedly, lying on the bed with a smile across her face.

Sitting on the pillow next to Shizuru's head, Sakomizu looked at her in amazement. "Aren't you worried at all?" Sakomizu asked. "Ah… after last night, I see you don't want to be a gingerbread girl again."

"I am still a gingerbread girl, old man. I just… I like being a human, too," Shizuru said. She was given some rest, and was told to be prepared for tonight's fun. She couldn't wait, honestly. Wee!

"Oh, now, you're deserting us!" Old Sakomizu poked his cane at Shizuru's eye.

Shizuru yelped, brushing him away. Sakomizu was bumped off the pillow and landed on the bed.

"That's it! I'm with Natsuki now!" old Sakomizu barked.

"Who's Natsuki? You've been mentioning that name for the past hour now."

"And I see you haven't been listening for the past hour!"

"Please, old Sakomizu. What is this about?" Shizuru pleaded.

"Natsuki is the newest guerilla gingerbread from our stock, and she's coming to kill you!"

"Kill me? How?" Shizuru frowned.

"Good point. Anyways, Maria is bringing Natsuki here as we speak."

Shizuru's eyes widened. "Are you mad!"

"We thought the princess would be here. We want you to make the princess eat Natsuki."

"No, she only eats me from now on! Screw Natsuki! I'll make the lady-in-waiting eat her!"

Sakomizu studied Shizuru for a second. "Don't tell me this is jealousy. You're not in love with the princess, are you?"

Shizuru blushed, giggling.

"The princess is getting married in six days. You have no chance with her!"

Shizuru looked sad, placing her hand over her forehead in a dramatic post. "I don't think I'll ever sleep again if she won't be there to greet me in the morning!"

Sakomizu gagged. Shizuru rolled her eyes; she remembered how excited the old gingerbread man was last night. Suddenly, Shizuru saw Maria sliding under the door into her room with another gingerbread girl she had never seen before…

_Oh, those green M&M eyes. So fine!_

_Oh, the tan, baked skin. I wish it against mine!_

_Oh, the flexible, red band. Swing me to the sky!_

Shizuru watched the guerilla gingerbread rolling across the field of granite floor to hide behind the nearest chair (rewind again and again in slow-motion). Not knowing she had already been spotted, Natsuki carefully glanced around, a roll of toothpicks, tied together with a dental floss, hanging over her shoulder.

_Are those the arrows of Cupid? How charming!_ Shizuru thought.

Maria stood at the door, wide eyed. Princess Tomoe was nowhere to be seen. But she couldn't waste this opportunity to get rid of this ape. She hopped to Natsuki. "Let's climb up the bed."

Natsuki confidently nodded, giving Maria some hand signals.

Maria frowned. "Drop that ridiculous signals! Humans can't hear us!"

"Oh…" Natsuki looked disappointed that she couldn't show off anymore.

Maria scoffed. "Have you come up with a brilliant idea to capture the traitor?"

"Of course! I'll shoot her with my arrow! The traitor will go down!"

"You don't plan to pick her teeth, do you?" Maria asked, smirking.

Natsuki laughed arrogantly. "I have these arrows bathed with poison!"

"What poison? Where did you get it?" Maria shakily lifted her glasses, getting a closer look at the toothpicks.

"The witches from the Valley of the Kings gave me these arrows—"

"THE WITCHES—"

"Don't you worry, Maria. I'll save the world!" Natsuki then ran towards the bed.

_How did the ape find the witches! How could things go so wrong! _Maria thought.

"SHIZURU!" Maria shouted, running after Natsuki.

Shizuru heard Maria's yell, but pretended not to hear it. She lied down on the bed and closed her eyes, smiling as if she was waiting for a kiss from the sexy chick. Sakomizu looked confused at the guerilla gingerbread, who eventually climbed up the bed to stand next to Shizuru's feet.

"SHIZURU!" Maria continued to shout.

"Do you have to wake the giant up!" Natsuki spat at Maria, who was climbing up the bed.

"SHIZURU, BITCH, YOU ARE GOING DOWN!" Maria quickly recovered, panting.

"What's going on!" old Sakomizu asked as he helped pulling Maria up.

"HUSH! THE APE—THE ALMIGHTY NATSUKI WILL SHOOT THE GIANT WITH POISONOUS ARROWS!"

"Hush your ass, Maria!" Natsuki yelled in annoyance, quickly pulling out a toothpick.

Panicking, Shizuru sprung up. "What poisonous arrows!"

"You need not know, traitor!" Natsuki aimed the arrow up and shot right at Shizuru's forehead.

"OUCH!" Shizuru's yelp didn't last more than a second longer before thick, mushroom cloud consumed her whole body.

KAZOOOOOOOM!

_I'm royally fucked…! _Shizuru thought.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: No beta!**

**---------------------------------------------------------------**

**CHAPTER THREE**

In the thick mushroom cloud, old Sakomizu and Maria toddled, trying to find Shizuru before the guerrilla Natsuki would.

"Do you think she's still alive?" Sakomizu asked.

"Let's just hope she doesn't turn into something bigger," Maria said.

The old gingerbreads stopped dead when the three witches appeared in front of them.

"Where is she!!!?" the fat witch asked.

"We need to find her before the cloud fades!" the fatter witch added.

"Hold up, girls! Wait for me!" The fattest witch finally caught up with her fellows, panting.

Old Sakomizu and Maria watched the witches and wondered how much weight the witches had gained in such a short period of time.

"Natsuki fed us with many chocolates."

"Natsuki sacrificed a few dozens of young gingerbread men to us."

"Natsuki, therefore, has our blessings."

Sakomizu made a face. "Ho!"

Maria looked around anxiously. "Where is the ape now!!!?"

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On the other side of the large bed…

"Ha! There you are!" Natsuki scurried to the unconscious chestnut-haired gingerbread girl, but halted when she got a clearer view. Breathless! She'd never seen a gingerbread girl as beautiful as this before. Her pink cheeks must have felt so warm and delicate Natsuki had to fight the urge not to pinch them. The witches must have given her wrong arrows since it had transformed the traitor into an angel.

With an arrow in her hand, Natsuki hesitated. She was told to stab Shizuru three times, killing her, before the cloud would fade, or Shizuru would transform into a human again. Forever.

"Ahhhh!" Shizuru woken from her sleep, screaming. Sensing some pain right above her eyes, she glanced up. The toothpick was still stuck in her forehead. Luckily, it didn't go too deep, or she might have brain damage.

"Don't move, or I'll stab you!" Natsuki barked, pointing the arrow at Shizuru's face.

Shizuru instantly pulled the toothpick out of her forehead and used it as a sword. "Don't make me do it, hottie!" She took a few steps back, escaping Natsuki's toothpick but accidentally falling off the bed. "Ahhhhhhhh!"

Without a thought, Natsuki jumped off the edge of the bed, trying to catch Shizuru's hand.

_I feel a fucking déjà vu!_ Natsuki thought.

Landing on Shizuru's tummy, Natsuki straightened herself up. "Are you all right—Why aren't you dead!!!?" She quickly stomped her foot on Shizuru's stomach, causing Shizuru to yelp. Clenching her fists, Natsuki told herself that she must do it for the gingerbread community. Shutting her eyes, she shot the arrows down at Shizuru like mad.

In the shower of toothpicks, Shizuru pushed Natsuki away and speedily crawled towards the door, panting. "Shit!" A toothpick shot right into her ass. Right then, she jumped into the corner, safe from the attack.

"You cannot escape, Shizuru! Turn yourself in!" Natsuki snarled.

Shizuru pulled the toothpick out of her bum. "Ouch!"

"One more time, Natsuki, and the traitor will die!" the fat witch said.

"Why don't you do it yourself!!!?" Natsuki spat.

"We're too fat to fly now. Hurry up! The cloud is fading!" The witch urged.

Natsuki then moved towards the corner. She hopped into the giant lingerie scattered on the floor, using it as a bunker. Judging from its size, it must be Shizuru's. Natsuki lowered herself down a little, allowing only her eyes to see above the smooth, black cloth.

_Smells nice…_

"Stop sniffing, you pervert!" Sakomizu yelled. He was watching them from the bed.

Behind the corner, Shizuru couldn't help but smile upon hearing it. Could it be that the sexy chic might be interested in her? Or just her lingerie? Did she look presentable in Natsuki's eyes as a gingerbread girl? She melted at the thought, but was snapped back to reality when Natsuki started shooting the toothpicks at her again.

"Oh, pretty thing, we need not fight! We can talk!" Shizuru hoped that Natsuki might agree.

"I don't talk!"

"Right, we don't have to do talk. We can do something else! Something like—"

"Like this!"

Shizuru frowned when she thought Natsuki's voice rang a little too near. She turned around again and…

"Aaaaaaah!" Shizuru screamed as Natsuki arched her arm, holding the arrow. But the last cloud faded just a split second before the toothpick touched her.

"I'm saved!" Shizuru yelped in triumph as she turned into a human again.

"Holy shit!" Natsuki exclaimed, staring up at Shizuru. _That's the largest pussy I've ever seen!_

Shizuru picked Natsuki up. "So what are you going to do to me now?"

Natsuki struggled in Shizuru's palm. "Your hand is so soft—Kill me now! I've failed the gingerbread people!"

"Who are you talking to, honey?" a voice came from behind, and Shizuru froze. All the gingerbread people froze, too.

"Oh, wow! These are so adorable!" Princess Tomoe scurried past Shizuru to the bed, grabbing the fattest witch and biting her head off.

_FUCK!_ All the gingerbreads thought, sweating.

Panicking, Shizuru tried to find a place to hide Natsuki. As if in slow motion, Princess Tomoe turned… turned… turned to face Shizuru. The chestnut-haired girl made a decision real fast: she shoved Natsuki inside her.

_WHAT THE FUCK!_ Natsuki screamed inwardly, but she couldn't bring herself to break the gingerbread law, which forbade them to move in front of humans. Rolling deeper in, she curled up into a ball inside Shizuru, grumbling.

"Did you bake them yourself? It tastes quite raw, but sweet nonetheless!" Princess Tomoe laughed heartily.

Shizuru gulped. Considering the gingerbread witch's age, she must have been months old. "Uh, yes… I—I baked them while you were gone." She slowly took a step forwards, fearing Natsuki would slide out of her.

"But nothing is as sweet as you! Raaaaawr!" Princess Tomoe roughly pulled Shizuru and down they collapsed onto the bed.

_Here we go!_ Maria, Sakomizu and the other two witches just helplessly hoped that the humans wouldn't crush them.

"Let—let's get these gingerbreads out of the bed, shall we?" Shizuru smiled dryly, reaching out for Maria and Sakomizu first.

Princess Tomoe tossed all the gingerbreads to the floor and then threw her arms around Shizuru's neck, pulling her down on top of her. "Mmmmmm, eat me!"

"Okay!" Shizuru promptly sucked the pink raisins, and just listening to the princess' loud moans could make her tremble with need.

_Strange! It's raining!_ Inside the small, warm space, Natsuki tried to brush the slimy liquid coming down, coating her body.

"Aaah…" Shizuru moaned as Natsuki accidentally elbowed her inside.

Natsuki stopped. _That princess must be doing something to Shizuru now…_ And it surprised her that she grunted over the thought. More rain. So Natsuki kept brushing, elbowing the slimy wall.

Shizuru cried out repeatedly, and Natsuki paused. Not the princess now, eh? It must be her. Did she hurt Shizuru or what? Squinting in the dark, Natsuki ran her hands all over the slimy wall. She gasped as if she had found a treasure map. _Ah! The Gingerbread Spot they talked about!_

Shizuru panted as she went down on Princess Tomoe. She tried to concentrate, but her head was reeling. She wasn't sure what Natsuki was trying to do.

"Hmmm, do I turn you on this much?" Princess Tomoe laughed as she grabbed Shizuru's crotch.

_Damn you, slut! If you can have Shizuru, so do I!_ Natsuki then worked harder.

"Ah… ah…" Shizuru kept doing what she was doing. Finally, she successfully replaced her own moan with the princess' louder one.

"Stop it, you ape!" Maria went behind the humans, shouting into Shizuru.

But Natsuki just scoffed at the old gingerbread woman, her hands kept rubbing feverishly.

The two witches joined and gasped. "Is this the gate to heaven!!!?"

"I'll stop this barbaric act!" old Sakomizu tried to climb into Shizuru.

"Leave it to me!" Maria pushed him away. But before she could get in, a toothpick stuck out, pointing at her face.

"Don't you dare entering my Shizuru!" Natsuki barked.

"Oh, now, she's yours!" old Sakomizu was exasperated.

Before the gingerbread people could settle their argument, Princess Tomoe came loudly. In fear, old Sakomizu, Maria and the two remaining witches sprinted to the other side of the bed.

"OH, YOU'RE THE BEST!" Princess Tomoe took a little time to breathe. She was a sex monster! She pulled Shizuru close and kissed her hungrily. "How you've honored me!"

_Honored!!? Fuck you! We, gingerbread people, do not honor a piece of trash like you!_ Natsuki crazily worked on Shizuru now. _I'll remind you what a gingerbread could do!_

Trembling, Shizuru wanted to scream, but just smiled with her jaws clamped shut instead. Princess Tomoe harshly pushed her down and straddled her.

"Nooo! Not there!" Shizuru panicked when Princess Tomoe moved her hand down the sensitive spot, fearing that the princess' fingers would find Natsuki.

"Mmmmmm, I knew it! I knew you'd like to try something new!" Princess Tomoe flipped Shizuru down.

"What are you doing?" Shizuru asked.

"Lift your bum up," the princess ordered.

"Why—"

"I'm gonna fuck your ass—"

"WHAT!"

Shizuru struggled to get out of the position, but this psychotic princess was as strong as any other psychotic commoners. She pinned her down easily.

"Aoi! Toy!" the princess demanded, and the lady-in-waiting promptly entered the room with a strap-on.

Shizuru's eyes widened. _What the hell is that sausage for!!?_

"Don't worry, sweetie. I'm not gonna use my fingers. That's a little germ-infested, don't you think?"

"Please! Please, spare me! Nooooooooo!"

Aoi grumbled inwardly, wishing she could be the one in bed instead. Ever since Shizuru's arrival, the princess had paid no attention to her. She was insanely jealous, especially now that the princess would be married in days to come.

"You can go now," the princess said, carelessly waving the Aoi away. "Oh, wait, tie her up—the bras on the floor would do."

Shizuru sweated. _No! I haven't pooped yet! _But she was too ashamed to admit it aloud. If she were a real woman, she could handle it just fine, whenever and wherever.

_She got her ass now!_ Natsuki grunted. But then she wasn't about to get into Shizuru's ass either. She'd rather be in a honey jar than in a poop pot.

And Princess Tomoe pushed in, slowly at first, and then picked up the speed.

_Shit! Oh, no, don't think about shit! Jesus! Oh, no, I shouldn't think about him!_ Shizuru shut her eyes tightly and tried to calm herself down. _Oh… oh… wait, it's kinda fun!_

"Oh, my God! Shizuru's getting it front and behind!" old Sakomizu gasped.

"Let see who will make it there first!" Maria lifted her glasses, watching attentively.

"Ten bucks, I'd say the princess!" Sakomizu said.

"Why?" Maria asked.

"Because that thing is bigger than Natsuki," Sakomizu replied.

"But it has no brain, and neither is the princess. Natsuki is full of tricks, and she's working hard, so she'll win. _But that's just my opinion_," the witch commented, arms across her chest.

Shizuru came hard. She screamed, clutching the bed sheet in her fists until her knuckles went white. Panting, she flopped down flat on the bed.

_Did I get it!!!?_ Natsuki wondered.

"Don't you love it, honey!!!?" Princess Tomoe pondered eagerly.

But they both had to wait for an answer later on. Shizuru had already fallen asleep out of sheer exhaustion.


End file.
